Sometime in the course of evolution, man decided that certain parts of the woman’s anatomy were exciting. And, as things unfolded, those parts had to be hidden, secured and guarded. This led to diktats around covering, concealing and, more recently, emerged a movement called moral policing.
It is unfortunate that women, however, missed the opportunity of taking a similar decision during evolution.
Just for fun, let’s imagine what would have happened if women took a similar stand on some part of the man’s anatomy.
Knuckles, for heck of it.
1. Gloves would be mandatory part of men’s dressing. Traditional and old-fashioned men would wear only khadi gloves and frown on the reckless young generation that ventured into flashy and bright synthetic ones, with those titilating cuts beyond the finger nails. Tchh Tchh, too deep and provocative.
2. Footage of gloves falling (I mean, wardrobe malfunction) off on the fashion ramp would be played and re-played on hour-long TV programs on prime time. Women would watch, replay after replay, in drooling anticipation that the ‘pixelated blur’ would take a second longer to appear as the gloves fell off. And, be disappointed every time.
3. Men wearing shorter gloves would be chased by millitant women, and get the hiding of their lives.
4. ‘Rap on the Knuckles’ would have had a completely new meaning, and be reported in Prevention of Harrassment Committee Meetings. where Supreme court precendents would be reffered to.
5. Women, would, now and then, dart furtive glances at men’s (covered) knuckles during office meetings. Men, awkward and uncomfortable by this, would try to hide their hands by sitting on them. Causing alarming increase in the rates of arthiritis at the ages of 25 years, thereabouts.
6. Bone graft material would overtake silicon as the MOST SOUGHT AFTER MEDICAL MATERIAL as knuckle-enhancement surgeries climbed to break all time records.
Ladies, think about it! We could have had our own moral police corps. And rapped the hell out of their knuckles!
10 responses so far ↓
Preethi // February 4, 2009 at 10:35 am |
Rachna,
Original & Brilliant I say!!
How I wish we can start a
“Rap the Knuckes Sena”
And mutilate Mutalik and his Vanar sena on their knuckles
Keep going… I love your brand of humor.
amritasimon.blogspot.com // July 12, 2009 at 4:18 am |
ditto
vijay // February 4, 2009 at 5:00 pm |
Yes, yes oh yes…… You got it right but you forgot to add that no parts incl knuckles or whatever w’d be covered with spaghetti/noodles strings/straps or cloth pieces made of blue jeans………..
Manoj // February 4, 2009 at 11:36 pm |
I have only one word.. Phenomenal!
Sagar // February 5, 2009 at 2:23 am |
Boxing would become the most watched sport. Domestic violence would become the most favoured form of pleasure.
Hillarious piece indeed. Kudos.
rachnaunedited // February 5, 2009 at 9:24 am |
Nice article in TOI today questioning why these guys don’t form corps to protect against female foetecide, domestic violence etc.
Sigh…I would like to se Muthalik come forward and make a clean, err, ‘knuckle’ of his real intentions.
Thanks for the comments, folks!
Janardan // February 5, 2009 at 2:28 pm |
Wow…Rachna…Nice thoughts…nicely penned…
Chaitra // February 5, 2009 at 3:38 pm |
Brilliant !!!!!
Nimmi Menon // March 25, 2009 at 4:26 pm |
Rachna, what a joy to discover another side of you! Thanks for the book – I managed to read 3 of those stories in between work today! And since Preethi sent the link, I am now on your blog…and thoroughly enjoying it.! Keep writing!!
Ranjini // March 25, 2009 at 4:43 pm |
Hey Rachna,
Lovely meeting up with you..& yes, kicked off reading your book “Nuptial knots” …Meanwhile the ‘Rap on the Knuckles” was an interesting read..